The bands and artists sometimes go out into the world to play in front of live people have been going on for quite a while. The older people still do not know how to behave in concert is a mystery to many.
In particular, acoustic concerts a problem, then it would appear that at least 20% of concert audiences only "looking out for a beer a trip to chat with friends."
That they have had to pay £ 150-1000 to get in on the concert seems to have no effect on behavior.
That it sits an artist on stage with an acoustic guitar and trying to get their message out to the public are also ignored.
The fact that 80% of those in the room standing or sitting and listening to that artist gives no reaction in these barns elves.
Who are these people? What are the warning signs?
We have some simple rules, which are specially designed for acoustic and often low-key concerts.
- If you can not text properly, DO NOT sing along.
- If you can text, but experience shows that you actually overpower artist when you sing with, NOT sing along!
- If you CAN text, and are impressed with the artist's writing, please do not repeat lines of text to your boyfriend after the artist has sung them.
(Cf: the left behind hippie standing next to me on Lars Winnerbäck at Ricks under Bergenfest 2005)
- If you no longer have glass building block in the shower because they cracked while singing in the shower ... NOT sing along!
- And everything in the world, you should NOT under ANY circumstances whistle melody played! Unless your name is Atle Antonsen so sound can completely miserable. AND you whistling tune. Believe me, even if it sounds good in your head, so it sounds absolutely horrid out for all of us.
- If the artist is trying to tell a story between songs, shut up! It is (mostly) a point in what he is trying to say.
- Whispers? NO good idea. It sounds if possible, even more annoying than the few who speak loud ... think about how funny it seems when Homer Simpson tries to whisper ... just the way you sound out. JUST so ...
- If your cell phone rings, do NOT take it! Switch off! You would matter off the phone before the concert started.
If you still need to answer, (it could be your wife tells you that labor has begun?), Go out of the premises. By all means do not talk louder and louder to drown artist .... eventually fail you in fact just that ... (see: Swede who sat next to me on Lars Winnerbäck on Bergenfest2005)
- If large parts of the venue turns at regular intervals and ugly stares at you and / or hush up repeatedly, take a hint and shut up!
If you are so full (or are with someone who is so full) that such hints are not perceived: Go HOME! Or take responsibility and make sure that your too drunk friend goes home.
- If you are on a their concert, DO NOT stand up all the time.
You irritates when everyone behind you. They also paid to get in, and would rather see the artist can obstruct the view of, than your occipital ...
Overall I can summarize:
If your name is NOT printed on concert tickets or concert poster, then it is a clear sign that you should actually be quiet while the concert is in progress.
What should the rest of us look for, if we want to try to avoid these people?
Before the concert, you can take a look at the venue and if you are not assigned permanent seats as one can to some extent avoid Skravlerne by looking for some simple warning signs:
- - Thread of middle-aged women, all sipping his glass of red wine and even before the concert starts have acquired a level that makes them sound all over.
If these besides sitting soaking up the scene and then you have a problem.
(Cf. gang of well drunk, middle-aged women sitting on the table in front of me at Mary Gauthier at Garage)
- - A full trønder in a group of locals.
This will quickly try to hide his homesickness to fling around her loud comments about everything he knows (or large cases thinks he knows) about the artist.
(Cf: Trønder with pipe voice that was behind me on Lars Winnerbäck the Chameleon)
- - Thread of excited teenagers (or often also waxes) which clearly has been afterparty where they have played the most famous album of the artist they are in concert.
Even before the concert sing along on the biggest hit and hollering and shouting loud enough to drown premises stereo.
- - The slightly sleazy guy who has decided to check up on her nice lady from vorspiel, often combining several of the above. Full acute treatment of the most famous hit, attempts at obscuring, loud explanation of the lyrics during guitar solos, and ... yes, most have not seen the point.
If you are near any of these people, do your utmost to trade places ...
Mary Gauthier said it looked fine when she played at the Garage, and the full ladies on the table in front of the stage going on HIGH for them to hear each other.
Ms. Gauthier leaned out over the edge of the stage and yelled at the most loud lady:
"HEY LADY!! Why do not you try two SHUT UP!! "
The applause would never end, and it was quiet from the edge the rest of the concert.
Do you feel hit by any of this?
Imagine if so about once the next time you go on a relatively acoustic concert ... choose either a local Death Metal band.
Your behavior has proved that the matter is not in concert for the texts their part ... and you manage to block a Death Metal band then you are probably in the right place at the right time anyway.
(Previously published in nrk.no / men's department)